Medication.

Buspirone, to be precise. It’s a mild anxiolytic (anti-anxiety) drug in the azapirone class, meaning it works on the neurotransmitter serotonin, but in a slightly different way from standard SSRIs like Prozac and Lexapro. I really thought I was done with medication, but two weeks ago, after meeting with my doctor, I agreed– after much hesitation– […]

Another Reason to Quit Smoking:

This just in: A lot of people smoke cigarettes to calm down, or to lose weight. New research shows that smoking actually has negative effects on both emotion and metabolism: In case the now common-knowledge health risks of smoking aren’t deterrent enough, new research shows that smokers have a 70% higher risk of anxiety and depression […]

Busy Getting Dizzy

A lot of my anxiety has centered on physical symptoms. The knowledge that I sometimes experience the world in a bizarre and distorted way that other people don’t just freaks me out. That’s the nature of any symptomatic disease or disorder, but the truth is that everyone experiences reality differently, and it doesn’t have to […]

Getting Back on the Horse

  (You’re welcome) For me, at this stage, sometimes a “bad anxiety day” isn’t even the worst part. It’s the morning after, waking up with that unnamed sinking feeling, and suddenly remembering: Yesterday I failed. Again. With this thought comes a bleak kind of depression that can hang around for days if I let it. This […]

Lost In Space

  Falling in love. Falling asleep. Falling apart. Falling. A moment of total release. It can be a sublime or a terrifying rush, a transcendent, floating space, or just absolute quiet. Generally, one only feels this when one is truly falling, either physically or between mental states– out of an airplane, into unconsciousness, in a dream. For […]

You Are Not Disabled

“You are not disabled”. Some of the most useful words ever spoken to me by a psychiatrist. My first reaction? He’s wrong. I AM disabled. Look at how hard it is for me to leave my apartment and go to class every day, to socialize, to do spontaneous and unexpected things.   Then I took […]